why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
