12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
She bit a glass in half.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
