is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
