She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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