There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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