i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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