i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
