are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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