No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
