are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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