Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
