Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
