he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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