So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
