that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
