I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
