i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Sober January is a disaster.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
