i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
