When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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