I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
His hands were made for my vagina.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
