Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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