remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Randomize
