im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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