There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
