The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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