We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
