What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Randomize
