so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
