i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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