is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
