i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
