It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
