dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She's the barista slut.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
