why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
