So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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