I only kidnapped one of them. chill
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
