i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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