Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
