There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
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