Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
