then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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