I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Randomize
