yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
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