I'm really into asian looking animals
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
They have beer where we have blood.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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