I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
