Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Randomize
