I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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