you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
