I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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