we have officially lost it.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
